Dinner tonight was steak, brown butter carrots and sugar…I mean sweat potato and carrot casserole.
Steak: get the old stuff that is on sale. Not the bright red stuff. If it is brown it will be tasty. Why, you ask? Because as meat “ages” it breaks down, becoming more tender. Bright red meat is newer and therefore tougher, no matter how pretty you find it. So get the brown stuff, then leave it in the fridge for a week. Mold? Cut it off! In a restaurant they call it aged and charge you $60 so STFU. Salt and pepper both sides. Put it on a grill till medium or medium rare… don’t fucking cook it any more. Eat it!
Carrots: Don’t over cook them!!!! first brown a stick of butter (how do you know it’s browned and not burned? Well it bubbles a shit ton and then if you stir it you’ll see brown instead of yellow.)
Then add ½ an onion brown it.
Then add 3 cups of sliced carrots (salt them first, heavily).
Then add brown sugar…how much is up to you…I did about ¾ a cup and it was not too sweet.
Cook till carrots are less crunchy than raw but still have some snap to them…this means taste the fuckers occasionally.
Sweet potato and carrot casserole:
Chop up sweet potatoes and carrots…as many as you want to eat.
Mix with 4 tbs of butter, brown sugar (1cup or so) and juice one old orange (you know out of the pile have laying around rotting). If you feel adventurous add several dashes of cayenne pepper, to make sure the kids will hate it.
Put in an oiled dish.
Cover with a few marshmallows…as many as you want assuming that the kids will go ape shit after dinner.
Cover that with a can of crescent rolls. I know you’ve seen the YouTube where they roll out the can and do fucking crazy things with it…just roll it out enough to sort of cover the dish you are cooking in. Nothing fancy.
Cover the dish with tin foil and bake at 3500F for about 30 min (until the sweet potatoes and carrots are soft) take off the foil for the last 10 min. to brown the top.
Hopefully your kids eat this dinner better than mine…although we have found that “special drinks” after dinner are a pretty good dessert/bribe…
Now for a short story from the day.
I grew up with just a sister…so having boys has involved more penis talk than I could have ever imagined…and they get boners from day one. That’s fun.
Tonight, as I cuddled my 6yr old to sleep. He was touching his penis, which I as a mom of boys know
that usually means they have to pee (things you find out with boys).
Me: do you need to pee?
W: no. it just keeps sticking up.
Me: then stop touching it.
W: but it doesn’t feel good. why does it do that?
Me: because blood is going into your penis because it thinks something is happening there.
W: but why?
Me: well the more you touch it the more the blood thinks it need to be there instead of in your lungs or heart. So stop touching it so the blood can go back to your heart and lungs.
W: ok
…and he falls asleep.
I can’t wait till 14.